Thor Review

Who's ready for non stop super hero movie action?! Eh. 3 super hero movies coming this summer (Thor, Capt. America, Green Lantern). Thor is the first. Quick summary. Thor is the son of Odin. Odin is the ruler of a far away land out in space that is super advanced in technology and magic. Thor is given immense power by his hammer, Mjolnir, (myol-neer) Basically Thor is a god with a sick ass weapon.

To the movie. Odin is getting old and about to pass his crown on to his son Thor. Everyone loves Thor cause he is a badass and super dreamy. Odin is a bit worried cause his son acts like Lebron and hangs out with his own super best friends. Thor gets angry, makes some mistakes, and Odin tosses his ass to earth, which apparently is prison, shoot he ends up in New Mexico, not exactly Detroit or Newark. Super smart scientist Nat Portman finds him, Thor tries to regain his power, and they fall in love. Of course we find out Thor was setup, his buddies come to save him and Thor does a 180, redeems himself, and blows shit up. Fin.

Basically I didn't like this flick. My first problem is the love story. Thor and Nat Portman fall in love in like 4 mins of film time. Puhhhhlease. Weak ass story, no reason for it, and totally unbelievable, which is saying something since it was easier for me to come to terms with the whole alien God thing. So there's that. Next problem is the production value. The special effects are good and all but the town they are in couldn't be more obvious as a movie town. Fake walls, fake streets, fakey mcfakness . Come on now, you spend 60M on EFX then skimp on the cheap stuff.

The movie has a couple good actors in Hopkins, Portman, and Rene Russo but none of them really do much for me. Portman is fine, the others are hardly on the screen. My boy Stellan Skarsgard is in it, love that guy, he plays Martin Vagner in Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, coming next summer from Sony Pics.

ANYWAY. This isn't an every mans super hero film. People can relate to Spiderman, and Iron Man, and the like cause they are human and happened to be played by really good actors. In comes a hero from space played by a guy who is all hot body and no Shakespeare. Yeah, not so much Marvel.

I give it two Cushes outta five. If you really want to be in the loop for the Avengers movie, go check it out, otherwise pass and see it on HBO or Netflix.

Go Bulls

Captain Omerica: The First Avenger (From Turkey)

Who would have thought that Thibs had the cohones to ride the hot defensive hand of RonRonJuice/TajMahal/Omerica? For a guy who is known to go with the same rotations from game to game, it was surprising to see him not be so stubborn. Overall, the Bulls played a balanced game. Deng got things popping off real nice in the first quarter and played well throughout on both ends. He started off slow in the 2nd half, but got things going later. Lt. Deng had a good bounce back game from his poor showing in game 4 and put up 23 points. Bogans had an 8-0 run by himself to put the Bulls ahead by double digits in the first quarter and played great D on JJ. Boozer had a decent game (11 and 12) but still had a few idiotic moments. Thought he was gonna get a T after head bobbing after a dunk, and he threw a elbow to J-Smooth's jaw after a dunk. Jo had a rough night all-around. He didn't have the aggressiveness and intensity and it seemed to carry over to the rest of his game. He ended up with only 6 rebounds and 0 points. DRose had another great game. He was aggressive going to the rim and got to the line frequently. His decision making on was spot on and he was able to get Boozer, Deng, and Taj involved. Still not hitting outside jumpers with great frequency, but putting up 33 points (on 24 FGA's) and 9 assists will make you forget that. With the line up that Thibs put out in the end of the third and fourth quarters, he had to carry the offensive load. Mission accomplished.

Teague is no longer playing under the radar. The dude is pretty much a poor man's 2008 Derrick Rose. JT pretty much got to the rim off the pick-and-roll when he wanted. Almost makes me wish CaptainKirk wasn't injured. News flash: his quickness is a problem for the Bulls. J-Smooth had an okay game, but wasn't able to dominate game 5 like he did in game 4.

The first stint of the bench mob was brutal. Their offense was brutal and unable to score. Korver was exposed as a defensive liability in the only 4 minutes that he played (zero shot attempts). Meanwhile Pachulia was keeping his team in the game by knocking down every shot and getting some timely putbacks. With a couple minutes left in the third, Thibs inserted Brew/Taj/Omerica and they didn't come back off the court. The Brewer/Deng/Bogans wing combination were able to stiffle JJ/JCraw for 15 and 2 points respectively and Taj/Omer worked hard inside. Omer has learned how to protect the rim without fouling and Taj can roam. Omer's numbers may not be pretty (0 points, 4 rebounds, and 1 block). But it was his defensive presence that made the difference. His +8 was better than both Boozer and Jo's combined (+4 and +3 respectively). Taj was perfect from the field in the fourth quarter. He was able to make his own shot on the post, and Derrick was able to find him open at his favorite spots on the court to knock down those jumpers.

In these playoffs, its been obvious that the Bulls need another scorer to help out Derrick. Their defense has been able to win them some games and Deng has usually been a reliable 2nd option. Last night Taj was able to be that other option down the stretch which was huge for his confidence and the team's success last night. The Bulls won't be able to hide Korver on the bench because of his defensive liabilities every game. He is too important to the spacing on the Bulls offense, especially when he knocks down shots to close games.

Trick or Treat?

In my opinion, the difference between game 3 and 4 was the Bulls' effort and energy on the defensive end. In game 3, the Bulls' stifling D not only held JJ/J.Craw to 17 points combined (2 in the second half) but it also led to easy buckets at the other end. DRose putting up a career high 44 points doesn't hurt either, but it seemed it wouldn't matter either way as the Hawks shot themselves out of the game. The Bulls are hard to stop when they are shooting lights out (Korver had 11 points and 3-for-4 behind the arc), cleaning up the glass (+9), and playing lock down defense. The Bulls' energy was high from the get-go as Larry Drew called a timeout :49 into the game after 2 quick Bulls buckets. Derrick set the tone early by knocking down jumpers, aggressively getting to the rim, and getting to the free throw line. Besides another good game from Teague on the offensive end, the Hawks clearly had nothing to look dejected throughout the game and were never in it from the beginning. They are notorious for mailing it in when they get behind early during the regular season.

Game 4 was a different story. Neither team was able to pull away early, but when the Hawks started out hitting 7 out of their first 9 shots you knew it was going to be a rough game. Derrick was able to get to the rim and the free throw line, but he wasn't knocking it down from outside. As good as the Hawks were hitting from the outside, the Hawks were getting more points in the painted area than they have all series. That can be attributed by the smarter play by Josh Smith. He still took some awful shots (you could hear groans from the crowd), but he kept those down to a minimum. Instead he was aggressive taking the ball inside and making good interior passes for easy baskets. JJ was back to his old self filling up the bucket, Horford was getting easy baskets, and Teague was also getting his own shots at the rim (3 of the Hawks starters had 20+ points, eww). Even with all that going on, and the Bulls shooting poor from the field (Korver stunk up the joint), the Bulls were still in the game going into the last 4 minutes. The Hawks ended the game on a 16-4 run which was marred by DRose taking some rough shots (almost all of them), Bennett Salvatore missing a foul on Rose from behind the arc, and Thibs doing his best VDN impression by losing track on how many timeouts he had left. The Hawks quickness and energy down the stretch was higher than the Bulls and it looks like everyone but DRose was cashed (even though he played every minute in the 2nd half). It sucks because maybe if DRose had some offensive help from someone else than Boozer (read that again), the Bulls win this game. Deng had maybe his worst game of the series (-9), Noah was nullified, and Korver was out of HotSauce. Taj had a decent game with 9 points, 4 blocks, and 2 steals (awesome open court steal from Teague) in 13 minutes. Oddly he also had 0 rebounds in those 13 minutes he played. Omerica had his best game of the series also playing 13 minutes scoring 3 points, grabbing 8 boards, and 2 blocks. Boozer had a good night on the offensive end as he was hitting his jumper for most of the night and had a big play to get the Bulls final lead of the night at 78-76. It sucks that the Bulls have to go back to Atlanta but I'm not hitting the panic button yet. The Bulls had a mediocre game and the Hawks over achieved. Josh Smith can't keep playing at a high (intelligent) level and I expect Thibs to make sure the lapses on the defensive end don't happen Tuesday night. Hopefully DRose won't have to put up 30+ shots again.

It's gonna get "Derby" this weekend

Chet and some of the staff are going to be on assignment this weekend at the Derby.  We shall be residing in the infield and probably getting faced.  I plan on personally taking down atleast a bottle of woodford reserve tomorrow because im awesome like that. not really.  The real purpose of our trip down there is to get our friend Perry Mason wasted for his bachelor party.  This has proven to be a difficult task for years now and we plan on getting this done for the first time in what has to be 10 years.  Not since we were 16 and on the stroller, or having an assorted liquor night has the gagermon taken heat. Anyways......here are a couple picks for the weekend.  Brilliant Speed if its rainy is free money....his mutter was a mudder. For some reason I am unable to embed the video of kramer....please refer to youtube.  also, perry mason's totally awesome dad who is known as the jamaican will be in the infield with us probably losing his sh*t.  It's gonna be classic.  I would bet all the chips on Brilliant Speed though if its raining......Toss the favorite or anyone who has odds less than 10-1.  its just not cool and favorites almost never win....The best horse almost never wins the derby, the field is huge.  The best horse name in this race was "Uncle Mo" who i would have bet on even though he went anorexic over the past year....other than that.....just pick 3 names out of a hat. and bet a tri box. Do it. congrats to Perry Mason.  I will be back with a recap of everything that is kosher next week......also, look for more frequent posts in the near future from chairman chet.  I have been slacking, but Im working for the first time in what feels like years so my apologies to our loyal readers.....which we have about 10 of.

I guess that was an improvement...

The reason behind why the Bulls won game 2 is two-fold; 1.) JoNoah and 2.) the Bulls owning the boards. Joakim was everywhere the Bulls needed him to be. He dominated the glass on both ends of the court and was able to come up with some huge put-backs on missed jumpers. His stat line of 19 points and 14 boards doesn't reflect his effect on the defensive end. The game plan to defend JJ and JCraw was to aggressively clog up the lane and show help when ever they ran an iso. Jo was a huge part in that as he was sagging off of Horford or Smith which led to one of them getting a pass and putting up a bad shot (mostly Smith, he was stinky). The Hawks as a team shot only 34% from the field (Bulls not much better at 39%) and JJ/JCraw were held to 27 points. Secondly, the Bulls were +19 in rebounds. Its good when the Bulls are getting many second shot opportunities and taking them away from the Hawks.

DRose had an okay game. He did score 25 points, but it was off of 27 shots. Furthermore he was 1-for-8 from behind the arc. Those need to start falling in order for the Teague to stop going under screens and sagging off him. Otherwise they'll just close the driving lanes that Derrick thrives off of so much. He did get to the rim more than game 1 and actually got to the charity stripe in game 2, so that is an improvement. He also had 10 dimes but with 8 turnovers, so those kind of nullify each other. He says that he is still confident in his shooting and those are shots he normally makes. Is his ankle bothering him? He for sure isn't letting anyone know if it is. Boozer had another similar performance with 8 points and 11 rebounds (one turnover, shocking). He is blaming it on his turf toe injury and I'm sure that it is indeed hampering his offensive ability and allowing Josh Smith some highlight-reel blocks (J-Smooth isn't getting much on the offensive end chucking up bricks). I guess we'll just have to live with it as long as he limits his turnovers and gets 10-and-10. The bench mob had a rough go at it. CJ was taking too long to get into sets and it led to a couple bad shots with the shot clock running out. Korver had a poor shooting night but was a +11 (compared to Bogans +1). Even if Korver is shooting poorly, he still spreads the floor and doesn't allow the defense to sag off Derrick so much. Might need to give more minutes to HotSauce. Taj had a decent game and was a +7, hes going to have to produce a little more and help pick up Boozer's slack. The Bulls certainly aren't winning pretty games. But they won and that is all that matters right now. Game 3 is Friday night in the ATL, hopefully the Bulls can keep owning the boards and keep JJ & JCraw to under 30 points collectively. Lord knows Josh Smith will still be there taking bad shots.

Will the real MVP please stand up?

Okay, I get it. Derrick Rose is the nicest most humble MVP ever. He gave a great speech and thanked his mom. It was all very heartfelt and he said all the right things. That being said, none of that matters anymore. Rose and his teammates lost convincingly to a team that they previously gave a thrashing to the last time they met. The Bulls got off to a very slow start going down by 10 points early during a DRose shooting stretch of 0-for-7. Honestly, I didn't think the Bulls would relinquish the lead once they got it in the 3rd quarter. But they were unable to do the same things they did against this team during the regular season. Derrick had ZERO attempts from the charity stripe and the Bulls couldn't control the glass. Another thing was that the Hawks (and especially Teague) executed a decent defensive game plan against Derrick. The Hawks were sagging off the pick-and-roll and not allowing The One to attack the basket aggressively, daring him to hit shots from the outside. DRose had no problem during the regular season proving his critics wrong about his outside game, but he wasn't able to keep the Hawks defense honest by shooting 2-for-7 from the land of plenty. When he was actually able to get to the rim, DRose was only able to hit 4-of-9 and somehow was never fouled on any of those attempts. Maybe the refs were waiting for him to actually get the MVP trophy. Was his ankle hampering him from playing his usual game? I couldn't tell you because he's been practicing every day so it doesn't seem like it. The cherry on top of this sundae of brutality is that JJ and JCraw were making EVERYTHING. Their quickness and sharp shooting was absolutely killing the Bulls and Thibs had no answer. Most of those jumpers were of the "ill-advised-fade-away-with-a-hand-in-your-face" variety. This was just one of those nights where they were making everything (JJ was 5-for-5 from behind the arc), and the Bulls were mediocre. JJ is good, but not good enough to put up 34 points every night. For some reason Thibs refused to double him. They need to get the ball out of his hands and into the those of his less talented teammates. Deng was our best player offensively, but even he couldn't keep JJ from filling up the stat sheet. Boozer played better than he had been recently (not hard seeing what he was playing like a couple days ago) and scored 3 straight baskets during a Bulls run. The bench mob surprisingly saw a lot of time together in game 1. They initially began the Bulls comeback in the 1st half and played a bit in the 2nd half. It was good to see them perform well, but Thibs may have rode them a little too long.

I'm not hating on DRose because he is obviously THE reason that the Bulls are in this position in the first place. But If the Bulls are gonna win this series, he needs to be the best player in the series. We'll see tonight if the Bulls are able to get out of this rut of slow starts and get Derrick going early. It's obvious he needs to be more aggressive and get to the rim or get fouled on his way there, the question is if his ankle will allow him to. His decision making needs to be on point on the pick-and-roll and he needs to be able to knock down the outside jumpers. I hope JJ doesn't have another night where he is making everything from everywhere, but you never know. The Bulls let one slip after Thibs got his individual trophy, hopefully the same thing doesn't happen now that DRose has his.

Fast Five Review

Too Fast. Too Furious. Who's ready for the summer movie season? Ready or not it is upon us. Get ready for 5 months of explosions, monsters, robots, super heroes, and formula comedies(looking at you Hangover 2.) I really think this is the summer people get their fill of super heroes. Thor, Capt. America, Green Lantern. Yay!

On to the review. This isn't your Pankiw's Fast & Furious movie. Those of you who pay a little bit of attention to these flicks know its pretty much tons of geared out gear head gear porn. This movie is less that and more mainstream action with car chases. The ending is just nonsense. To bring you up to speed. Dom(Vin Diesel) has just been broken out of prison by Paul Walker and Jordana Brewster. The super elite team of super agents have been hired to track him down and bring him in. Hobbs(played by the Rock) is all piss n vinegar going after the group. So everyone ends up in Rio, Dom decides to pull one last job(riiiiighhhhtttt, until the next movie) and then everyone goes their separate ways. Of course to do this impossible job they need to bring everyone back from the old movies cause the mission is CRAZY. Explosions, poop jokes, and a billion car crashes latter everyone leaves without a scratch on them.

There are a billion plot holes in this movie, and I swear at one point the Rock was thrown through 3 walls, smashed in the face 10 times, in a car crash, and shot. But is no worse for wear after its all said and done. If you can look past that sort of thing the movie is enjoyable. Hot local, good action, one liners, and even a dose of Ocean's 11 in there. This movie is very watchable even if you haven't seen any of the other ones, in fact it would be the only Fast and Furious I would every recommend to anyone, its just a solid popcorn flick. And for those worried about the asain dude from Tokyo drift, its cool, hes back because this a prequel to that horrible movie.

Lil Hollywood insider note. Vin Diesel is apparently a dbag. Shows up late, doesn't know his lines, and thinks he is a big deal. Word is the Rock showed up on set in shape, and 3 times the size of Vin. Knew his lines, was kind to the crew, and generally set the tone. Vin got all butt hurt and tried to get in shape at the last minute, which shows in the movie, he is mostly arm shots and yelling. Lil Carlos Boozer in his game really.

I give Fast Five 3 and half Cushes

Welcome to the ATL

In a shocking turn of events, Thibs won COY. That’ll happen when you slap 21 wins on a team that finished 41-41 last year. He may want to thank DRose for his new piece of hardware. As Thibs will most likely say, this isn’t the piece of hardware that he is ultimately trying to obtain. It’s obvious that he and the rest of the team are gunning for the Larry O’Brien Trophy (worst trophy and worst trophy name in sports?), and the Atlanta Hawks now stand in their way. The Bulls played this team three times in the month of March and won the regular season series 2-1. The Hawks stole the first game by coming back from a 17-point deficit in the second half and the Bulls blew them out of the gym the last two games #HealthyAndConfidentCarlosBoozer. Lets break this series down.

Starting Five:

The latest word is that CaptainKirk is doubtful for the series with an injured hammy. Hinrich is by far the Hawks’ best perimeter defender and with him out, DRose will pretty much have free reign and will be able to do whatever he wants on the court. For Derrick, getting to the rim should be, as Stacey King would say, “easy cheese”. Deng has been a stalwart on both ends of the court all season and its good that both he and Derrick got these extra days of rest. Joakim is looking like he is back in form and is no longer plagued by injury. After a negative MRI, Boozy is still not practicing. Hopefully Carlos can get out of this funk and gain some confidence in this series. Hawks will throw JJ, Horford, Josh Smith, and Jason Collins at the Bulls. JJ has no problem filling it up and Horford has a good inside game. Look for JJ to take advantage and drop a bunch on the smaller Bogans, but the Bulls defense should be able to not let anyone else hurt them. We may even see JJ guard DRose a little as the Hawks try to throw a bigger guard at him. Advantage: Bulls

Bench:

The Hawks have last year’s 6^th man of the year Jamal Crawford at the Bulls off the bench. The guy could definitely deposit the ball in the hoop, but has more holes in his defensive game than a fishing net (could be worse than Boozer believe it or not). Besides J.Craw, the Hawks have Zaza Pachulia (the Jeff Foster of this series), Dominique Wilkins’ nephew Damien, and the former #2 overall draft pick Marvelous Marvin Williams will also come off the pine. Thibs proved in the Pacer series that he shorted up his bench rotations. HotSauce, TajMahal, and RonRonJuice will see most of the minutes. BigSexy and CJ will see some minutes due to foul trouble, but not many (although I would love to see Omerica and Zaza exchange Eastern European pleasantries #AsikAndDestroy). Korver is playing well and Taj came up huge in the last series, hopefully that will continue. Tough call here, but I’m giving the Bulls the slight edge because Zaza ,Marvin, and ‘Nique’s nephew are a pu-pu platter of stink. Advantage: Bulls

Coaching:

Both coaches are in their first year, but as everyone knows Thibs has been in the league for a lifetime. Larry Drew was able to develop a great game plan against D12 and the Magic, but I don’t think the same strategy will work for him against DRose. Plus Thibs just won COY, the man is on a roll. Advantage: Bulls

Intangibles:

The Bulls showed in the first series that they weren’t going to retaliate hard fouls with hard fouls of their own. The Hawks may take a page out of the Pacer playbook and make Zaza and Jason Collins their own goon squad and try to take Derrick out of his game. The Hawks’ roster isn’t filled with the same type of gritty, “blue-collar” players on Indy, and this plays into the Bulls hands as they lost the battle for those 50-50 balls against the Pacers. Advantage: Push

Prediction:

The Hawks’ plan against D12 was to play him straight up man-to-man. They were willing to let him score inside as long as they locked down their perimeter players. Implementing that strategy against DRose would be a mistake. Unless Hinrich comes back, Jeff Teague on an island by himself guarding Derrick would be an absolute nightmare. The Hawks offense is mainly isolation, which plays right into the Bulls hands. The Bulls D should be able to clamp down on that. Look for the Bulls to learn a lot from the first series by mainly not turning the ball over as much. Bulls in 5 if Boozer shows up, Bulls in 6 if CaptainKirk shows up.

Can we trade Boozer for Burrows?

The Bulls were able to win Game 5 in regular season fashion. They looked like their old selves by playing good team defense (minus Carlos the Playoff Ghost of course), a shooting percentage above the Mendoza Line, and a MVP performance by none other than DRose. The Bulls were up by 10 early in the 3rd when Derrick picked up his 4th foul and had to sit. The Pacers whittled the lead down to 4 and Thibs had to roll the dice with DRose in foul trouble. It was at that point where Derrick added to what will be a pantheon of great playoff performances. The 3rd quarter became the "DRose Show" as he first hit TajMahal for an open J, then he put a savage block on Hibbert (couldn't find a version with Stacey King), and then he started raining 3's. Bogans joined the party with a few 3's of his own. Bulls closed the 3rd with a 21-8 run and the Fat Lady was warming up her vocals. Shows how much trust Thibs has in Rose even though he was playing with 4 fouls. The ankle didn't look like it was bothering Derrick as much last night, but it's great that he gets to rest it until their next game which won't be until Monday. DRose had the help from his surrounding cast that they've been looking for this whole series. Joakim and Lt. Deng played both played great. Noah looks like he's in full form since his late season injury. Deng was pouring it in from everywhere and at the same time chasing down Granger the whole game. TajMahal made a strong case for himself with a 30-minute performance that maybe made Thibs think about starting him Game 1 in the 2nd round. Taj put up a solid 10-point performance in place of a foul-plagued and "injured" Boozer. This is where the Boozer-hate-fest portion starts, feel free to skip ahead to the Hawks review.

Sixteen minutes played, 2 points scored, 5 rebounds, 4 fouls. No, that isn't Kurt Thomas' stat line. BigSexy got a DNP but I would have much rather had him in the game than Booz. He picked up 3 quick fouls in the 1st half and only played 10 minutes. Supposedly he suffered from "turf toe" injury in the 1st half. This immediately bring's two things to mind: 1.) apparently you can get turf toe on other playing surfaces than turf, and 2.) Boozer was playing healthy the first 4 games?!?! Ugh. The performances of TajMahal and Bogans picked up Boozer's slack and it looks like we're going to have to look for those performances in the next round.

In other news, the Blackhawks season is over although they went out with a bang. After sneaking in the back door to make the playoffs and coming back from a 3-0 deficit against one of their main rivals, the Hawks were playing in a 7th game down by one goal with only a couple minutes separating them from what looked like the end of their season. Burrows and Kesler were absolutely dominating the Hawks and they looked like they were unstoppable. With Duncs in the sin-bin, a comeback was certainly almost impossible. Then with a little bit of magic, Toews made a great individual effort just to get the puck to Hoss in a place where he could get a shot off, and then The Captain got a shorthanded put back goal to tie the game. Unreal. My neighbors probably thought I was slaughtering a cow with all the hooting and hollering going on. I thought the game was ours going into OT. Hawks had all the momentum, Bobby was doubting himself again, and the Hawks picked up a quick man advantage. I thought the game was over when Sharpie took that shot from a wonderful pass from Toews through the crease. The game ended when Campoli was unable to clear the puck from their zone and Burrows got a little bit of luck snatching the biscuit out of the air for the breakaway winning goal. Crawford was huge last night. He made a bunch of clutch saves and single-handily kept the Hawks in the game. It was unfortunate that his stellar performance resulted in a heartbreaking loss, but hopefully he can use this game as a stepping stone and raise his game next season.

And so ends the Hawks campaign to defend the Stanley Cup. Perhaps the loss of great role players like BigBuff (who raised his game to All-Star status this year) and Ladd proved to be too big of a loss to the team. Hopefully they can build on what they have with a promising Ben Smith and Nick Leddy. At least we still have the Bulls before we have to start watching baseball. Bulls Round 2 preview to come later...

Game. Blouses.

This needs to end now...

This was almost the scene at Conseco Fieldhouse on Saturday afternoon. You could almost hear the entire city of Chicago (and half of the crowd at Conseco) let out a collective "Oh Shit..." when Rose went down with a sprained ankle. He was obviously smarting from that injury after he came back into the game as he shot 3-for-16 (6-for-22 for the game, eww). Even when the Bulls were pressing and shooting the passing lanes, Derrick came up with a couple steals but couldn't finish at the rim like he usually does. The comeback would obviously been great not only to close the series, but also the added rest for Derrick and his now injured ankle. This game was again marred by turnovers and a poor shooting percentage. Before the injury, DRose and the rest of the team were settling for outside jumpers. Derrick couldn't drop a 3, while the Pacers were hitting anything and everything and popped out to a 18 point lead. After DRose's injury, the Bulls needed a second scorer to emerge and help take the game off of his back. Can't look to Boozer the Playoff Ghost. Another poor shooting game for Booz (6-for-15). Seriously don't understand why he constantly is shooting fade away jumpers when Jeff Foster is checking him. The one time Booz did finish strong at the rim he got T'd up for staring down Hibbert, once again showing how dumb Booz can be. Deng had a rough night going only 5-for-14 for 16 points and Korver wasn't knocking down shots. The Bulls were starving for someone else to score and Noah was the only one who showed up. He ended up being the team's leading scorer and proved to be too fast for Hibbert as he had a couple great drives to the hoop. The only knock on Jo was that he kept trying to get the interior passing game going early, but that just lead to turnovers. Especially because he was passing the ball to the NBA player formally known as Carlos Boozer. I'm guessing Thibs wasn't especially happy with the result and probably stuck it to the team afterward. Hopefully this loss can finally get the Bulls to get back on their game and back to playing the way they did in the regular season. Reports were out that DRose showed up to the Berto Center yesterday in a walking boot and did not practice, but the MRI was negative. DRose will play tomorrow night, no doubt. Hopefully the treatments, a little bit of R&R, and a video session with Thibs will get his game right. Bulls look to close out the series tomorrow night. Lets go.....

Public Enemy Number 1 : Jeff Foster

                                                             Creep

So this guy is really starting piss me off.  He is literally trying to get players on the Bulls injured.  He has been playing middle linebacker in the paint and I literally have no idea how Kurt Thomas has not stuck a shiv in this guy's side and put him on his ass.  The Bulls as a team and specifically Derrick Rose and Luol Deng have shown a ridiculous amount of restraint in not killing him or McRoberts.  Jeff Foster is a goon and we may need to put this in the hands of the Greek who will be taking a trip down to Indy to watch the Bulls break out the brooms against the Pacers Saturday.  We have a certain red haired friend who will be accompanying the Greek and we may need to employ his services to take care of Foster.  How this POS has managed to stay in the league for 11 years boggles my mind.  He's averaged a stellar 4.4 points per game over 11 seasons and never more than 7 points per game in his career.  Foster is playing like Charles Oakley and Dennis Rodman during the late 80s and early 90s, main difference being he sucks at basketball.  I mean Foster, White Basketball Jesus, and McBobs have been going after DRose maliciously and I think someone on the Bulls needs to step up and hit them right back in the mouth.  The MVP should not be getting treated with this much disrespect.  I nominate Boozer to take care of this.  It's the least he could do considering he cannot score anymore.  Go Bulls, break out the brooms.

Listen Carlos, we need to talk...

Seriously? I knew game 2 was too good to be true. Someone put out an all-points bulletin out on Carlos Boozer. When did he turn into Zack Galifinakis? Watching him play tonight almost gave me a stroke. He starts the game by missing two bunnies two feet from the rim, picks up two stupid fouls, and then needs to sit for almost the rest of the half. How Thibs doesn't rip out what little hair he has left, I have no idea. Four points (2-for-10) and 11 boards, big fucking deal. You suck. If it weren't for your 2nd of TWO MADE FIELD GOALS, I would have thought that you forgot how to dunk or at least didn't have the athletic ability to do so. I'm sick and tired of you screaming "Gimmie dat shit!" after every rebound you do get, and "Grab dat Jo!" after every rebound you're too lazy to jump for. Aren't big time players (and largely compensated) supposed to show up during the post season? He has less confidence than Rory McIlroy on the 10th tee at Augusta. People want to complain about how bad Bogans is? Bogans has less expectations than Boozer, is not making as much cash as Boozer, and scored more than twice as many points tonight than Boozer. I hate you Carlos. Did you really let Josh McBobs drive past you for an uncontested layup? I realize you are both Dookies, but that doesn't mean you can just let him get on the scoreboard. Aren't Dookies supposed to have a high basketball IQ? Could have fooled me, because you make Corky from "Life Goes On" look like Christian Laettner.

Okay, that's enough. But seriously, Thibs has to hold that man accountable at some point. If this is how he's gonna play, the Bulls could absolutely get swept by the Heatles. The only thing that was nearly as bad as Boozer was the officiating. The zebras had a few calls wrong, namely falling for the Pacers flopping and what should have been called a flagrant on Foster for dropping 'bows on Lt. Deng's dome piece. Surprised they didn't fall for AJ Price's best Reggie Miller's "I got fouled while shooting" leg kick impersonation. Again the Pacers prove that the lack of a closer that they can go to down the stretch hurts them. Granted, Granger was on fire for the last couple minutes. But all his shots are coming off screens or loose balls as he can't make his own shot. As usual, DRose came up huge in the last minute. Although he went 4-for-18 from the field, he still managed to get to the line a bunch and put up 23 points. That last drive to the hoop he made was amazing. The Bulls played perfect defense on the Pacers last possession, forcing Granger to put up a tough contested shot from deep, RonRonJuice grabbed the board and hit the FT's to close it. Deng quietly had a great game. The Man from Sudan couldn't miss a shot in the first half. He was able to put up 21 points while trying to guard Granger on the other end. Still a little confused as to how the Bulls are still managing to turn the ball over so much and why they didn't keep going to HotSauce down the stretch. Without the Pacers' points off turnovers, this game is a blowout. Korver came up with some huge shots near the end and couldn't miss. Why they stopped passing to him, I don't know. I'm just glad the Bulls won while shooting less than 40% from the field. Bring your brooms Saturday afternoon because its gonna be a sweep.

Welcome back Boozer

Let's not jump back on the Boozer train too hastily. Looking at the box score he put up 17 and 16. But for some reason, at least to me, it didn't look like that great of a game for him. He still looks shaky on defense and looks like he is on skates when he closes down shooters. Lucky for him, Psycho-T returned to normalcy and wasn't hitting open looks. Overall, it was a very identical looking game compared to game 1. But is Thib's game plan of playing good defense and let DRose win it at the end going to keep working? Again it was a close match until Rose hit some clutch shots in the closing minutes to put the game away. The Pacers looked a little unorganized in the clutch moments of the game. Paul George ended up with the ball with the shot clock ticking down on 2 straight possessions. Seriously? They obviously don't have a superstar who can make their own shot down the stretch. The Pacers were obviously missing Collison after he left with a sprained ankle. The Bulls outscored the Pacers 23-11 with AJ Price playing with their starters. Bad news for Indy if Collison sits tonight.

Albeit, the Bulls are up 2-0 and winning games in the last couple minutes in stunning fashion. And even though they are better than what their 37-win regular season record says, this is Pacers that we're talking about not the Heatles. The Bulls were 2nd in point differential this season and they're squeaking out victories, AT HOME no less. But I suppose this is the playoffs, so you can throw whatever happened in the regular season out the window. Tonight is when this new Bulls team earns its stripes. Playoff games on the road is where players make a name for themselves. It is where good players become great. Two years ago, DRose shocked the NBA world with his other-worldly play in front of an unsuspecting and hostile Boston crowd. I still have no doubt the Bulls will sweep this Pacer team. Hopefully these next two games on the road will change something in this team so that they can play to their potential.

WHAT TIME IS IT!!!! GAME TIME, WHOOO!

Wow, this blog really lost some steam and tyler colvin bobblehead night

Lady Killer

Yea, so I know there has not been much written lately, but the Chairman of Cheddar has actually been trying to do something with his life over the past week.  Anyways, we are back and in full swing starting with the Bulls, Hawks and all things Chicago baseball.  Cubs boring. Did you know that the Cubs have been 1-1,2-2,3-3,4-4,5-5,6-6,7-7, and now 8-8.  That is actually kinda crazy but also boring.  How bad has Dempster been?  Jesus, between him and Garza, I do not know who has been more horrendous.  But you know who really stinks..........the White Sox.  I would have never guessed the Sox would go through a stretch like this all season.  The division is upside down right now with the Indians and Royals on top.  Point being, it does not matter. Those teams stink.  STINK.  They will have be back.  Adam Dunn and Juan Pierre have been brutal this year.  Adam Dunn has quite the strikeout ratio going right now.  He is on pace for something like 350 strikeouts.  That would be quite a feat.  I am totally shocked by this. I would blame it on the cold weather, but Dunn comes from cold weather, plus he is not from the Dominican so that excuse is not valid.  Pretty sure Ling Ling will have something on the Hawks blowout and upcoming Bulls game.  We will be giving you live coverage of game 4 as some members of the Cheese's writing staff will be making the trek.  Go Bulls.  Anyone want to go to the 6:05 Cubs game with Chairman Chet tonight?  Or you can buy them from me if you are interested. 10 dollars a ticket? Let me know, its Tyler Colvin bobblehead night. sweet

TV worth watching

Stop watching that dogshit reality TV for a moment and tune in to HBO. There is also a gem on AMC right now called "The Killing"

Mad Men won't be back for a while so we must make do. You'll also have True Blood and How to Make it in America (Lake Bell, very nice). Entourage will mercifully be put to bed this summer, finally.

Which reminds me. I literally ran into Adrian Grenier two weeks ago. I am pretty sure that guy rolls out of bed and onto the set. No makeup, no wardrobe just straight action. Nice guy though.

Game of Thrones is also awesome but a bit on the geekier side.

The next Basketball Jesus

Well that wasn't fun. Tyler Hansbrough is going to be better than Larry Legend. Just kidding. I knew Psycho-T would be giving Boozer a hard time, but I at least thought Boozer would match him on the offensive end. Boozer got owned on both ends of the court. Don't confuse this as "Tyler Hansbrough should have been an all-star" because everyone knows that he isn't that good, he just had a great game. This may sound cliche, but what he lacks in basketball skill he makes up for in basketball IQ, grit, and hustle (AKA - the recipe for white guys who can't drain 3's for making the NBA). Boozer happens to be the exact opposite. Looks like Boozer's feet are buried in concrete on the defensive end. During post-game conferences Boozer blamed his timidness on both ends was because he was in foul trouble. Um, Booz, try harder on the defensive end, move your feet, stop pointing and screaming, and then you won't be in foul trouble. Thibs stood up for his guy and said that it wasn't just his fault and said that the team failed as a whole in trying to stop Psycho-T. Partly true because TajMahal and Jo had a hard time too. Thibs knows that Carlos needs to figure it out on the defensive end. Maybe Thibs needs to make a change and switch Jo to check P-T instead of Booz. There's no way an undersized white boy who doesn't shoot beyond 15-feet should be lighting up this Bulls squad. To say that Derrick had a great game is an understatement. You can obviously see by his 39-point (19 from the charity stripe) that he was the best player out there. Even the Pacers coach was in awe. But his run in the last 3:00 were unbelievable. He refused to lose this game. Unfortunately, this is the playoffs. This can't happen every game and every night. The Pacers played a great game, I'll give them that. We can't expect them to be on fire from beyond the arc tonight as they shot well above their average. But whether its against the Pacers or beyond the first round, Boozer is gonna have to play up to his contract if the Bulls are to advance.

It's Playoff Time

Well that was fun. Bulls improve their regular season record from 41-41 last year to 62-20 this year. They went from the 8th seed to home-court advantage throughout the playoffs. The acquisition of Thibs, Boozer, and a good surrounding cast, multiplied by DRose's evolution over the summer (development of a 3-pt shot, USA national team experience, increasing confidence, etc.) are all to thank for the drastic improvement from last season.

All of that doesn't really matter anymore as the 1st round of the playoffs is upon us. The Bulls are a favorite to win the East and many have already locked them in to get to the finals. Kind of crazy seeing as DRose has yet to make it out of the first round let alone play in the Conference Finals. Did Thibs play this team too hard during the regular season? Phil Jackson and Greggy Pop know not to stretch their teams too much in the Fall and Winter because the meaningful games don't start until April. Will this team's playoff inexperience impede a deep run let alone a trip to the finals? I think it would be foolish to not take these arguments into account. But with that being said, I don't think we'll have to think about that for another week and a half as we have a 37-win Pacer team in the 1st round. The Pacers are the only blemish on the 15-1 Bulls record against divisional opponents and enter these playoffs as the worst team based on their overall record. On the other hand this Indy squad has given good teams a handful. Ever since their coaching change and Psycho-T's emergence as, well a psycho, they've been giving teams fits. Let's break this bitch down.

Starting Five:
The Pacers could give the Bulls a hard time because they have a decent PG in Collison, George and Granger are pretty athletic on the wings, Psycho-T will be giving Boozer fits, and Jo isn't playing at 100% (Hibbert sucks). But they have less playoff experience than the Bulls, the Bulls have the #1 defense, and the Bulls have Derrick Rose. He's been driven to win more than ever before and there's no way he's not getting out of the 1st round against this Pacer team. Advantage: Bulls

Bench:
Being that we're in the playoffs now, Thibs will probably be pretty short on his rotation. Brewer, TajMahal, HotSauce, BigSexy, and CJ will probably be the only ones seeing meaningful minutes. Butler looked good in the Nets game and may see more minutes if Brewer is still hurt. Pacers will be throwing out the pu-pu platter of AJ Price, Mike Dunleavy, Josh McRoberts, Dahntay Jones (no, this isn't a Duke reunion), Jeff Foster, Brandon Rush. TJ Ford has just come back from injury and may not see a lot of minutes. Albeit the Pacers will more likely go deeper into their bench, TajMahal and Korver would be starting on the Pacers. Advantage: Bulls

Coaching:
Frank Vogel was thrust into the position after the firing of Jim O'Brien and the Pacers have been playing well under the interim coach. But lets be real, although this may be Thibs' first year as a head coach, he has 20+ years in the NBA under his belt, was a main architect of the Celtics' past successes, and coached his team to 62 wins. Advantage: Bulls

Intangibles:
The Bulls will be kicking off the NBA playoffs Saturday at Noon in front of a rabid crowd at the Madhouse. This team has been the best this city has seen in more than a decade and have been waiting for a team this dominant ever since. The city of Indianapolis is just glad that their team made the playoffs and their fans are probably more excited to watch the Bulls play in Conseco Field House two more times. Advantage: Bulls

Prediction:
I think we might see a Bulls blowout in one of the first two home games and tougher games played in Indy. But get your Adam Scott putters out because I'm looking for a SWEEP in the 1st round. Bulls in 4 (.....aaaaannnnnnd there's the jinx).

I guess I Put the Hex on Matt Thornton and the White Sox Bullpen

Well, all that love that I spewed on the Sox Bullpen was obviously premature.  Apparently Matt Thornton does not have the stones to close baseball games.  They say the toughest outs to get are 25, 26, and 27 and that has proven to be the case this year.  The Sox are extremely lucky to be where they are seeing as that they have 6 blown saves already.  Twice the Sox have blown 3 run leads in the 9th which is really heartbreaking.  The Sox as a team have a bullpen ERA of 6.00 which yes its early but outside of Sergio Santos, everyone has been awful. Chris Sale's velocity is noticeably down.  Last year his fastball ranged in the 98-100 MPH, but this year its more like 94-96, which is cause for concern. Sale's ERA is over 7, as is Thornton's.  And then there is Pena and Ohman who have ERA's over 11.  Crain's been decent and I already mentioned how Santos has pitched.  The Sox are going to need to get this figured out, otherwise Ozzie is going to lose his mind.  He is already a crazy crazy man, but this could be the season where he totally loses his mind.  You have to wonder why the Sox didn't use any money to sign Rafael Soriano. If you combined the money they gave to Ohman and Crain, you pretty much have the money needed to sign Soriano.  The move would have made sense, but to late now.  I believe he would have taken a couple less million than he got with the Yankees to actually be a team's closer.  Well, obviously can't turn back the clock now, but atleast this is happening in April as opposed to August.   This happening in April allows the Sox to make adjustments and make a trade in a month or two. In the short term though, I really think Ozzie has to try Santos now as closer. He has wicked stuff, and hopefully he will have the stones to take the job and get outs 25, 26, and 27. 

Why Can't Juan Pierre Catch Fly Balls

Now, if you read this site regularly you know what I think of Juan Pierre.  He Stinks.  No ifs ands or buts about it.  He stinks and I do not care what argument you make that he does not.  In Juan's defense, he has hit decent this year, and probably should have atleast one home run if not for the early season leader for catch of the year by former Cub Sam Fuld.  Well, lately, Juan has had a huge issue catching fly balls.  There is only one explanation for this: ENORMOUS HAT.  The guy wears a hat and its just too damn big to see.  Now Juan has always worn his hat like a gangster rapper and teenagers nowadays as opposed to like a real ballplayer. 

Now, Juan is no spring chicken anymore, but there is no reason that he should be playing the outfield like Alfonso Soriano.  Juan unlike Sori is not a guy who takes plays off, which means that Juan is just getting really bad.  Back to the issue of the hat though.  With that oversized brim which is pretty straight, how does Juan catch anything.  I hate the way he wears his hat and I hate the trend of how kids 10 years younger than me wear their hats like this and look like absolute jackasses.  This whole trend started with Juan and CC Sabathia.  I hate it passionately.  I am someone who believes in the bent rim of a cap.  The reason for that is when you bend the rim it can actually block the sun and keep it out of your eyes.   When I was coaching baseball, my second year my whole team had the straight brim look going on and I despised it.  They called me who was 25 at the time an old timer because I wore my hat the way it should be when your playing baseball.  They wore it like they were gangsters and left the stickers on and all that jazz.  Totally disgraceful.  Anyways, our record matched the way we looked.  10-20.  Pitiful.  All our team seemed to care about was how we looked, and the record showed that.

Next up. Matt Thornton.  Stop blowing saves. I know Juan can't catch, but you have to get through that. Stop sucking, it is screwing with my fantasy teams performance.  Get with it. 

Seriously Quade, What the F**k?

I swear to God, this Cubs bullpen which I thought would be a strength is el horrible.  This season so far has been a gosh darn joke.  Quade's management of his pitchers this season has really made me question what the hell the Cubs were thinking hiring this guy. This is just awful.  I just do not know what the hell he is thinking.  He is leaving his starters in way too long, especially Dempster.  I know Dempster was all over Quade's shit this off season and praising him as the second coming of God in the dugout, but so far all I have season is a bunch of missed signs and poor pitching management.  IE. why the hell was Demp still in the game tonight after Bill Hall hit an oppo bomb off him.  After that he should have been pulled immediately.  But nooooooooo, he stayed in to give up a 2-run bomb to some dude named Sanchez. This team should be 6-3 at worst going into this series with the lowly Astros.  Instead we are 4-5 and its not looking good.  Unfortunately this season looks to me like it is lost already.  I just really don't understand Quade's game management.  He stinks.  This is not the minor leagues dude.  Winning actually does matter.  Getting guys work means nothing in this league.  I do not think he understands that John Grabow is not good.  He should be pitching in bull shit games.  I know Wood sucked up the joint yesterday, but if the Cubs have a lead I dont want to see anyone but Marshall Wood and Marmol.  I just do not like where this season is heading.  Quade gets an F from this guy so far.

Chet Steadman = Wally Backman

If anyone was curious about what I was like as the manager of the St. Viator Sophomore Baseball team in 2008 and 2009, I would have to choose my man Wally Backman.  While I do not know anything about Wally, I do know a little about myself, and I could not have found a better video of someone that emulated me in my coaching days more perfectly.  Without further interruption, Wally Backman.

Hello my friends...

The limo industry in Vancouver should be on the upswing as Patty Kane is back. As everyone very well knows, the Hawks slipped into the playoffs via the side door as the Stars failed to beat the Wild (Marty Havlat still loves Chicago). It's too bad that the Hawks couldn't pave their own way into the 8th spot with a win against Detroit, even though it proved to be a pretty entertaining game. Mikey Frolik got the party going with a goal in the 2nd only to be answered a minute later by Kronwall, and then followed up by another by Datsyuk. Kaner played like he was still hungover from partying the night before and Datsyuk was shredding the Hawks D. Drew Miller got a junk goal at the beginning of the 3rd putting the Wings up 3-1. At this point, it seemed like they were gonna lose the game until Seabiscuit dropped a bomb from the blue line to cut the lead to 1. Then the Hawk D broke down again as former Hawk draftee Dan Cleary put one past Crawford to go up 4-2. Duncs got one in to cut the deficit by 1 with 8 minutes left, and the Hawks pushed to try to tie the game up. They failed to convert a powerplay in the final 2:30 and couldn't come up with the 1 point needed to secure a spot. In the end, the Wild threw us a huge favor and the Hawks have a date with Bob Luongo just as I asked for.

Bulls won against the Magic without Dwight Howard. Didn't watch much of this game as I was committed to the chief and of course the insanity that was The Masters.

After the most boring "Moving Day" in Masters history, I was pleasantly surprised with probably the craziest Masters Sunday that I've ever watched. It was so open that at one point 7 different people had a share of the lead. Tiger got this baby popping off first with a 31 on the front. He absolutely slayed it. Birdies at 2, 3, 6, and 7. A very Tiger-esque eagle at 8. Then he capped it off with almost an impossible par save on 9. He was just one off the lead at the turn and had the look and demeanor as if he was gonna flip this tournament on its head. His back 9 wasn't as stellar as we hoped. Had a 3-putt bogey on 12, and only mustered out a par on 13. He stuffed his second shot on 15 to 5 feet, but missed his eagle putt that would have put him in solo 1st. Grabbed a birdie at 15 and then grinded out pars for the last 3 holes and in the end he finished tied for 4th. Some people will jump and say that Tiger is back, and I hope that is true. Golf is much more entertaining with him in the mix every Sunday. He made Masters Sunday incredibly entertaining, and I hope that continues throughout the year.


And then.....there was Rory. Everyone was wondering how the young 21 year old kid from Northern Ireland would be able to handle the pressure with owning the 54-hole lead at Augusta. For the first 9 holes he looked a little shaky but still had a 1 shot lead over Tiger (and Charl) and could possibly just grind out a winning round. But then the back 9 at Augusta reared her ugly head and crushed his hopes. Rory yanked his drive off 10 into the woods (get your chainsaw out), punched out from an herb garden for his 2nd, yanked a 3-metal back into the woods for 3, hit ANOTHER tree on 4, on the green on 5, and then 2-putted for a 7. Didn't end there for the young lad. Bogeyed 11, Double bogey on 12 (4-putts), drove the ball into the creek on 13 (still saved par), and bogeyed 15. Thanks for coming out Rory. Just an absolute brutal back 9 for the guy, almost feel bad for him. He was even able to give a classy immediate post-round interview with Peter Kostis and somehow didn't break down in tears. But he also highlighted his hair earlier this year and looked like an idiot, so I don't feel as bad.

Then there were the guys with funny accents. The boys from down under were in the mix down the stretch. Adam Scott, Jason Day, and Geoff Ogilvy were able to tame the back 9 and were dropping birdies almost at will. Scott almost had an ace at 16 and hit a bunch of huge putts (with a broomstick none-the-less). Day was right there with him finishing the round with back-to-back birdies to get to -12. Geoff Ogilvy birdied 5 straight holes to put him at -10 (t-4) and the other Aussies finished T-2. Pretty amazing seeing as this was Day's first time at Augusta (led the tournament in birdies with 23) and Scott pretty much fell from the face of the planet after being deemed the next big golfer a couple years ago. Hopefully we'll see more from these two going forward.

Meet Charl Schwartzel. Started the day with the chip-in birdie on 1 and then dropped an eagle on 3. He was tied with Tiger for 2nd and 1 back of Rory at the turn. Hung in there with 10 straight pars even after the collapse of Rory, Tiger's run up the leaderboard, and the Aussie's birdie barrage. It was then when Hot Charl dropped a deuce on the chest of the rest of the field and birdied the last 4 holes to win his first Green Jacket. He had a great combination of luck (holes 1 and 3) and played the best golf down the stretch. That's what you need to win at Augusta. He said that he felt completely comfortable out there. Easy to say when Phil is putting the jacket on you and Rory is balling his eyes out by himself.

Going into Sunday, I thought this was Rory's tournament to win. Turns out he didn't have the stones to hold the lead and it led to the most open Masters in history. Overall it was a very entertaining and intriguing tournament, bring on Congressional and the US Open.

Pre-Tournament Picks (Just happy they all made the cut)

• Philbo Baggins: -1 (T-27)
• Luke Donald: -10 (T-4)
• Stricks: -5 (T-11)
• Tiger: -10 (T-4)
• Bubba: +1 (T-38)
  

Cry Me A River

Between the Master's, Blackhawks and Bulls dominating yesterday's daytime TV rotation, I have a feeling most people missed this interview on ESPN. I stumbled upon it half way through with a sobbing Tom Brady struggling to get a word out and apologizing to the camera for letting his emotions get the best of him. I paused to let the interview play out because I thought for sure something serious had happened. These ESPN stories are always inspirational and depressing at the same time, so why would this be any different? Eventually Brady was able to gain his composure and says, "Then finally the Patriots called my name." Wait, what? This puddle of tears is about getting drafted in the 6th round and not the 3rd round? I get it, it sucks to be passed up by other teams and it's normal to hold a grudge against those teams but let's save the tears. Maurice Jones Drew did the same interview and talked about wearing the #32 because that's the number of teams that passed on him in the first round. MJD also talked about how he changed his last name in honor of his late grandfather that raised him and passed away during his final college season and he didn't shed a tear. News flash for Tom, you got the last laugh. You have more MVP's and Super Bowl trophies than all the QB's taken ahead of you combined and are a first ballot hall of famer so let's not get so dramatic here. Usually you hear people say that Tom Brady has it all being the star QB, having millions of dollars and and being married to a model but if you combine this with the hair, dance moves in Rio and man Uggs, you gotta start to question this guy.

P.S. In case you were wondering, the Bears had two 6th round draft picks and took WR Frank Murphy and K Paul Edinger, both who were drafted before Brady.

Today's episode was brought to you by the letter 'W'

BULLS CLINCH 1ST PLACE!!! HAWKS WIN AT DETROIT!!!!!!! SOX LOOK LIKE THEY MIGHT WIN TONIGHT, BUT WHO CARES IT'S ONLY THE 8TH GAME OF A LONG ASS SEASON!!!!! (I mean seriously, it's the home opener weekend and they can't even put 5,000 fans in the seats?!?!) CHICAGO SPORTS IS ON TOP OF THE WORRRRRRRRRLLLLLLDDDDDD!!!

Wait. What? Did he just? Where the f--k did that come from? TIGER WOODS IS 3 BACK?!?!?! DUDE BIRDIED HALF THE COURSE?!?!?! IS RACHEL UCHITEL IN GEORGIA?!?!?! HIDE YO KIDS, HIDE YO WIFE, AND HIDE YO HUSBANDS, CAUSE TIGER WOODS IS RAPING ERRRRRRRRYBODY OUT HERE!!!!!!

Source Code Review

Quantum Leap meets Ground Hog day. That is exactly what this movie is. Story goes like this. Army hero is chosen to save the city of Chi. They use a new method called "Source Code" to tap into the last brain functions of a deceased person. Basically they view a persons memory but are able to let someone act out the memory in anyway they choose. Not a lot of science behind this one but it doesn't really matter as its pretty obvious whats going on in the flick. So our hero, Jake Gyllenhaal (Harvard-Westlake's finest) relives this memory over and over again to find clues on who is looking to set off a massive dirty bomb before its too late! In the process he of course starts a little relationship with Michelle Monaghan (She purrtty) and that leads to a feel good ending. Felix from the new Bond movies is in it, I like that guy, would kinda like to listen to a book on tape with him doing the reading. It's also heavily filmed outside of Chicago in Glenbrook so all you homers can love that.

It's an average movie at best. In fact I'd describing it as not sucking, which really means its not good but you also wouldn't want to call it bad. Frankly I wouldn't spend $13 on this thing, especially this weekend when you got Jim Nantz to lull you in and out of sleep on Sunday at Augusta. Save this one for Netflix.

Verdict: 2 Cushies outta 5.

There are other sports going on????

Apparently Chairman Chet is trying to take my job. Nothing much else to note that he didn't cover. Rose was pretty damn efficient last night scoring 30 points. What was scarier was their lock-down defense. Noah was done early and didn't see a minute in the 4th quarter. So much for trying to fix the deficiencies with Boozer. Jo is probably still hurt with an ankle injury and it was good for BigSexy to see a lot of meaningful minutes as he will be Jo's backup come playoffs. It was noted that Thibs played a pretty short rotation last night with BigSexy/Korver/Brewer the only ones seeing a lot of time. Could be a sign that Thibs doesn't completely trust the "Bench Mob" in big game situations. I guess we'll find out in a few weeks. Bulls magic number is 1 for 1st place and they should be able to achieve that tonight in Cleveland against the bloated corpse named "B-Diddy". Should they somehow not manage to pull that off, hopefully they can do it against a Magic squad without Superman.

And now onto the Hawks. They're in Detroit tonight. Ugh. Why does their postseason future come down to 2 games against the mutha f-ing Redwings? After a huge OT goal by the Captain on Wednesday against the Blues, the Hawks eliminated the Flames chances of playing anymore hockey. Hawks have a 2 point lead ahead of the Stars (they play the 'lanche again tonight after beating them last night) and are 2 points behind the Ducks (they play the Kings tonight). Big time players come through in big time moments, and this my friends is the behemoth. Thank god Sharpie is back because they'll need him to come up big tonight. They just need to get into the postseason, then anything can happen. Personally, I'd like to see them as the 8th seed. Why? Because they own Bob Luongo. If the Hawks oust the #1 seeded Canucks for the 3rd year in a row, Bob should just hang up the pads and go back to the backwoods of French Canada.

As for my Masters picks, they were awful. The way Tiger is playing, he might not even play tomorrow. I am mush.

In other sporting news, this is a ridiculous goal by Inter Milan's Dejan Stankovic across half of the pitch in a Champions League match against Schalke. Click the link, you won't be sorry.

Bulls Beatdown

That was not even fair.  D-Rose said he thought the Bulls were going in the wrong direction.  Well that assessment was the recipe for a great performance by the Bulls.  D-Rose was awesome per usual, and Lieutenant Deng had a second half to remember.  The Bulls made the Celtics look old.  Does anyone else love the fact that the Bulls do not need to guard Rondo until he gets to the free throw line.  You could have done the same thing to Derrick last year.  This is why D is so revered in this town right now.  He took the time and made himself a complete all around player.  Rose was phenomenal last night and proved why he is the MVP.  He hit some huge 3's and had some insane drives to the basket as usual.  That's enough gushing about D. I feel like I could do that for hours on end.  I just love him. its getting a little wierd.  Anyways, did anyone else miss the fact that John Lucas III and Janero Pargo sit on the end of the Bulls bench.  Thats just awesome.  I mean I hope during the playoffs when John Lucas II is in the stands they show him every other second like they did when JL3 was lighting it up with Tony Allen at Okie State.  I mean JL2 got more air time than the actual game.   Nonetheless, this Bulls team would not be complete without a guy on the bench with a famous father that we can show during playoff games in Chicago instead of Jim F'ing Belushi and John Cusack.  I'm done with those two. To conclude. Bulls 'SHIP

Edwin Jackson : Filthy

          
The Sox opened up in strong fashion yesterday jumping on David Price early for a couple of runs and not turning back.  Edwin Jackson was phenomenal setting a White Sox opening day record for strikeouts.  He had 13 k's and only gave up 4 hits and 1 walk.  While some questioned this trade for the White Sox when it occurred, it really seems to be working out for both sides so far.  Both Jackson and Hudson have been fantastic since switching teams.  Hudson was electric at the end of last season turning in a great second half with the Dbacks.  And Jackson was solid down the stretch last year as well, but he has started this season on absolute fire.  His stuff has been filthy.  On another note, Juan Pierre still stinks.  He could hit .400 and steal 200 bases and I would still think he stinks so anyone who thinks they can change my mind please go ahead.  I find it so funny to hear Sox fans who ripped this guy when he was with the Cubs give him so much praise now.  His numbers are identical to when he was a Cub.  Next:  Adam Dunn is tough as nails.  This man wants to play tomorrow despite having an appendectomy.  Large balls.  Thats all I have to say about that.  Oh yea, and Johnny Damon is hitting .053.  Thats pretty bad, even for this early in the season.  More on the Bulls Later.

Get out of my stadium

Is there any doubt I am like the Santa Clause of blogging? I don't come around very often, but whenver I do it is with a sweet gift that is without a doubt going to brighten your day. This little gem is a personal fave. You wonder why Cubs fans get a bad rep? Absolutely hilarious.

Opening Day: The Cubs biggest fan from WBEZ on Vimeo.

Why so serious!?

Uhhh. People from Iran Looking At the Cheese

What's the deal with that? The last thing the Cheese needs is Ahmadinejad checking the site.  I mean you have to wonder what in God's name anything written on the cheese is possibly interesting to an Iranian. You would think that our free wheeling and dealing here at the cheese would not relate well with Iranian culture, but who knows, maybe we can be the voice of the Iranian people who are living under a dictator/psychopath who does not believe that the Holocaust even took place.  Iranians unite against lunacy in power. Chairman Chet is with you. Bring it Ahmadinejad.

How Bout them White Sox and why Does Everyone get Hurt

So that was quite a comback against the Mexicutioner.  It definitely did not help my fantasy team as I saw my team ERA sky rocket after his horrendous outing. Carlos Quentin is playing out of his mind this year.  I mean absolutely out of his mind.  Mark Buehrle did not have a very good outing whatsoever, but got bailed out by his team's great comeback.  Even more remarkable was that the rally was all after two outs.  The Sox bullpen did a good job holding the Royals down offensively after Buehrle left the game.  Congrats on a nice win.

The Sox open up against the Rays today with Edwin Jackson on the hill.  The Rays have been awful this year. Longoria is out.  I look for the Sox to take 3 out of 4 this weekend against the Rays. David Price on the mound today so this could be the one they lose, but I still like them to win the series.

Randy Wells and Cashner on the DL.  Not good, especially when Ryan Dempster continues to get rocked.  He needs to figure it out and figure it out fast. To start 0-2 with an ERA over 7 against the Pirates and Diamondbacks who stink is not good.  The Cubs have gotten 4 great starts and 2 horrible starts.  Those 2 starts belong to Dump.  He better figure it out fast otherwise this team does not stand a chance this year.  This team will struggle with Cashner and Wells out.  Just bad bad bad.

A tradition unlike any other...

No, I'm not talking about Butler shooting 18% from the field. I'm talking about the Masters. Azaleas. The Eisenhower Tree. Amen Corner. The Green Jacket. Fried chicken and collard greens. Gives you the chills doesn't it? Okay maybe I'm not as captivating as Jim Nantz, but you shouldn't need his silky-smooth commentating to get pumped for the greatest golf tournament of the year. Screw baseball and opening day, this is what signals Spring for me. Its the most pristine looking course you'll ever see and the tradition behind the tournament is unparalleled. I'm gonna take a step away from the Bulls/Hawks to give you a preview of this years tournament and my favorites to put on some oddly-colored formal wear come Sunday.

Phil Mickelson is public enemy number one in my book. I don't know if I can adequately express how much I abhor this man on this website. Chairman Chet will probably try and revoke my writing privileges. What's even worse is how much the media is slurping him and his chances of winning this weekend. Just because he won last year and the Shell Houston Open last weekend (against a mediocre field) doesn't mean we can start re-fitting him for the Green Jacket just yet. I don't care that he is the most liked player on tour and I certainly don't care that he is finally ranked higher than Tiger for the first time since he hired his first escort (1997). His extensive knowledge of the course and ability to hit a ball really far and into a small hole will most likely put him into contention on Sunday but hopefully he won't win.

Luke Donald didn't make the cut last year, but he has been really golfing his ball this year. The Evanston resident is in the top 10 in scrambling and putting this year. Both are keys to win any tournament, but will be especially needed this week. He won the WGC Match Play tourney against world #1 Marty Kaymer earlier this year and was a rock for the Europeans in the Ryder Cup. The man is consistent as they come, he just hasn't been able to get over the hump when it comes to majors. Even though a euro hasn't won at Augusta since 1999 and he won the Par-3 contest yesterday, (the winner has never put on the Green Jacket in the same year) I think there is a good chance he'll be in the mix on Sunday.

You can't talk about consistency without mentioning Stricks. A favorite of Squints, (you may remember him from posts such as his introduction to the cheese and....his 2nd post) I however also dislike this man. My reasoning is three-fold: 1.) he is from Wisconsin, 2.) he went to U of I, and 3.) he cries after every tournament he wins. All valid arguments obviously. Stricks is #1 in putting this year (no surprise) and that will certainly come in handy if Augusta's greens are as fast as they are normally. You can guarantee that the waterworks will be flowing if he puts on the Green Jacket.

I wonder how much weight bitch tits Phil can curl. Anyone who knows LingLing the BBall Panda knows that I am camp Tiger Woods. Always have, always will be. Ian Poulter went on record as saying that Eldrick won't finish in the top 5 this week. Idiot. Tiger's life was in shambles and didn't play a tournament last year before going to Augusta. He tied for 4th. Why? Because Tiger knows this course like the backside of a B-list pornstar. He knows every curve, undulation, and every spot to put his ball to give him the best shot at getting it in the hole (not enough corny puns?). Granted, he is re-vamping his swing and hasn't been playing well at all this year. But you'd be stupid to think he isn't going to do well this week. Tom Rinaldi pretty much asked Tiger in an interview if he thinks he is ever going to win again. Tiger wanted to backhand him across the face. Screw you Rinaldi.

Other than Tiger, my actual pick to win the tourney is Bubba Watson. He has only played at Augusta twice and his best finish was a T-20, but he's playing well over the past year. He won his first tourney in 2010 and was in a 3-man playoff in the 2010 PGA. He's probably not on anyone's list to do well this week and I'll be first to admit this pick was made purely on bias. But this course favors those who can hit the ball right to left. Guess what, that is right up the big swinging lefty's wheelhouse. Bubba is one of the longest hitters on tour and is in top 3 in GIR. When you're hitting greens in reg on the reg, you're cashing in on the reg. I truly believe this man can contend for the jacket, what I don't know is if he can keep his emotions in check while in contention over the weekend. He showed guts during the PGA last year, we'll see if he can use that experience to his advantage this week.

Coverage starts at 2PM on ESPN, 7AM if you're lucky enough to have the Golf Channel.