You Heard It Here First....

What do TMZ, People Magazine, Perez Hilton, and all those other salacious "celebrity" magazines and websites have in common?  They weren't the first to break the Cutler-Cavallari baby story.  We at the Cheese were on this story two weeks ago.  I'm not saying that we pride ourselves on releasing athlete/celeb gossip or that this is what we will be writing about from now on (although it's probably more interesting than what we really have to say about Chicago sports).  But when Neil Armstrong performed the first moonwalk he didn't just look around, strut his stuff, and pack his shit back into his space shuttle.  NOPE.  He planted the American Flag to show the world and those communist Russians who runs outer space. #justsayin

Turf Toe is a bitch....

Pictured: Not actually DRose's feet

So it's been more than two weeks since I've wrote anything meaningful, well, besides the truth about J-Cutty knocking up K-Cav of course.  But since then the Bulls have played 11 games and have gone 9-2 in that stretch.  This includes the one and only back-to-back-to-back series which the Bulls are the only other team (OKC) to win all three of those games.  However during that stretch of games, DRose suffered a turf toe injury against the T-Wolves (all joking aside, Ricky Rubio is the truth).  Since then he played in the rout against the C's and Raptors, and has sat out the rest of the games.  Today he is listed as a game time decision against the Cavs, although many thing he won't play.  He's said that he has had this toe injury since his 2nd year in the league and it hasn't really bothered him until now.  He describes the pain as the worst it's ever been, even though he says he wants to play.  Hard to believe that an injury that is described as "Turf Toe" can be this debilitating.  But having never played contact sports, and being generally nonathletic, I'm not one to speculate.  The masses are calling for DRose to suck it up and strap one on.  But I say let him sit and here are my reasons:

• Schedule - The Bulls play the Heatles on the 29th.  The only other team the Bulls play worth mentioning before then are the Pacers.  Otherwise all the other teams are cake.  Other than this statement being the ultimate jinx, the Bulls should go 5-0 before taking their talents to South Beach with DRose as healthy as possible.
• Defense - The Bulls offense is, how can I put this lightly, not good.  They are 14th in the league in points scored.  However, they are 1st in the league in points allowed.  As we saw last year and in year's past with the Celtics, staunch Defense can help win most games.  
• Luol Deng - The underlying story of the season.  This guy is an absolute work horse.  He's logging a lot of minutes and is performing well both offensively and defensively every night.  He is often asked to guard the opposing team's best player and still manages to put up 15-20 points a night.  If Rose sits for a prolonged period of time, Luol will have to pick up the slack, as will Rip and Boozer.
• Big Picture - The goal of this season is to obviously win a 'ship.  Home court advantage is great, but not necessary.  The Bulls proved last year that they can win playoff games on the road (unless the opponent is Miami).  Best record in the East isn't the most important thing.  If you can remember (hard to forget) how bad Boozer was in the playoffs because of his turf toe injury.  He had zero lift and lacked explosiveness.  Can't afford that to happen to Rose when those big games come around.

Derrick needs to get as healthy as he can and the truncated schedule wouldn't help anything.  Getting to the playoffs with a healthy Derrick is a priority.  Beating the stupid Cavs without him is a certainty. Plus, the Bulls have the White Mamba to close out games.  Dude is like the Mariano Rivera for the Bulls.  Why doesn't he get more burn from Thibs?  Teams are just doubling him because they are scared of his uncanny scoring ability.  What is the scouting report on this guy?  "Scalabrine - Can't allow dribble penetration, double team him anytime he gets the ball"  With the incredible court vision that only a ginger could have, when the double comes he somehow finds the open man.  He is just being a boss, facilitating the rock, and tossing up quick dimes to the Turkish Hammer.  Who needs CP3 when you've got Scals coming off the bench, refusing to score, and setting teammates up on the reg.

Cutler is still slinging it....

Baby Bear???

Bear down Chicago bears, because in about 9 months, Kristin Cavallari will be.  The Cheese has an unnamed source (not named Steven A. Smith) that has revealed that J-Cutty and K-Cav (don't think people call her that, but whatever) are with child.  As if Cutler didn't have his own ass to worry about when he is standing behind the porous sieve otherwise known as his offensive line.  Now he has to make sure he doesn't get his arm torn off by Ndamukung Suh and his baby doesn't grow up on welfare.  

Go see Girl With The Dragon Tattoo

Hello friends,

Been a while since I had anything to say about movies but I felt stirred to action after A. watching ESPN give me 30 straight hours of Tim Tebow coverage. And B. learning that Devil Inside made 34M this weekend.

Listen. I've said this here before. You people need to stop watching super shitty reality TV, and movies. This is why you keep seeing them get made, because YOU keep seeing them. I'm pointing directly at your Blogmaster Jim and Ling-Ling(stop stealing my shit Ling-Ling).

By now everyone knows what Girl With the Dragon Tattoo is. 3 books, written by a Swedish author, that became the cat's meow a year ago. Of course the movies were made, made well I might add, in Sweden. Go ahead and rent those after you see the American version in the theater.

"But it's just another remake!" Hogwash. It is a remake but it's so much more than that. The production value is through the roof. The acting is outstanding from everyone. And the story is gripping. The film is directed by David Fincher who did movies like Seven. Super gritty and dark. This movie kicks even more ass if you haven't read the book because you don't know whats going on. Trent Reznor did the soundtrack with the same guy he teamed with for The Social Network so each scene makes you feel like YOU are the one being stalked. Get there for the opening credits, its wild and creepy.

Rooney Mara, related to the NYG football family I believe, is outstanding. Not sure if it's the perfect role for her or if she is an amazing actress. She hasn't been in much else so hard to tell but I think she is super hot so that's a plus. Playing her character is not easy. Dan Craig (James Bond) is very solid as well. There are a host of other talented actors in the film that you will recognize.

I'd even suggest seeing this in IMAX if you can. I did and it was worth it. I haven't been so on edge in a movie since Crash, that scene where the little girl jumps into her Dad's arms and you think she got shot. Yeah I had that same gut wrenching feeling through about half of this movie and even closed my eyes once or twice. It really brings you in.

Anyway, go see it, its awesome but isn't making any money in middle America, and that puts the sequel in jeopardy. Drag your dumb wifeys and girlfriends with you. It's 287% better than Real Housewives of Highland Park.

Full disclosure: this is not a movie from the studio I work for, so I have no interest in it other than its awesome.

Holy Cheesus!!! The Bears Fired Jerry

Well, to be totally honest, this post would never have occurred had Jay Cutler not gone down with that freak injury. The Bears would be 12-4 and heading to NY to beat the bejesus out of the Giants, and while I would much rather be watching the Bears in the playoffs, the rebuilding of a 3rd Chicago franchise is about to occur.  In Jerry's tenure, the Bears were slightly above .500 and were 3-4 in the playoffs. Is that good? Not really.  It's actually quite bad.  In 11 years the Bears won 3 games.  Yes they made it to a Super Bowl, but they were extremely inconsistent and in all these years with Jerry, it was actually not until this year that I felt the Bears were legitimate SB contenders.  Even when they made it to the SB, the chances Rex was going to win that game vs. Peyton Manning were slim.  So let's look at why Jerry was an average GM who managed to keep this great NFL job for 11 years and why the Bears were so average during his tenure.

1.) Talent Evaluation : In Jerry's 11 years, he has been one of the worst evaluators of offensive talent in football.  He has been unable to draft offensive lineman to play for this team.  In 11 years, he has been unable to obtain talent to keep an NFL quarterback upright.  Most other teams do not have this issue.   As far as the rest of the offense goes, the Bears have never had WR who would be a number 1 on any other team in the NFL. It was as if he was consistently drafting the same identical 5'10 180 lb receiver or the 6'4 230 receiver who couldn't run.   The best WR he has picked has been Bernard Berrian and as soon as he left he couldn't even stick as a number 3 for the Vikings.  Jerry's hands down best pick has been Matt Forte, but then he butchered this pick by not locking Matt Forte up prior to Forte having a breakout year.  Forte is one of the most diversified backs in the NFL.  Forte could have been had for Frank Gore money, possibly less, and now we are going to have to franchise tag him or sign him to a much larger deal then we would have had to.  In a close second for his best pick is Devin Hester.  Hester may very well go into the HOF as a return man.  Outside of those two picks, Jerry in my opinion made very few picks that helped the team put points on the board offensively.

2.) QBs : This is what I call a wasted decade because outside of the last two years, the Bears wasted a decade of outstanding defense by not winning a SB.  The defense kept the Bears competitive and made watching the Bears a pleasure these past 11 years.  The Bears in the BC(Before Cutler) days, never had a chance with the QBs they were running out there.  They were never going to be able to win a shootout vs. a Brees, Manning or Brady.  And now to this year.  How the Bears went into the past 2 seasons with Caleb Hanie as the backup is inexcusable.  Why the Bears did not go after a McNabb or try and make a deal was outrageous to me.  This team had promise and they just gave the season away.  Cutler would have been back for the playoffs had the Bears been able to take care of business against the garbage in the AFC West.  Pisses me off.  This blows....I think I need to stop talking about this because thinking about the slate of games we get to watch this weekend makes me sick. .....

PS....Anyone else bet OK State last night.  Talk about a painful way to lose a bet you should have never won in the first place.  I couldn't sleep at all after that game. Stayed up watching Seinfeld trying to laugh but was just unable and then went to work this morning exhausted.  Fudge

Bulls are undefeated in 2012!

This man may not score another point for the Bulls this year.

If there is one thing this Bulls team needed, it was a blowout win.  The Bulls played 4 difficult games in California with Rose and Deng logging a lot of minutes.  Both hardly saw the floor in the 4th quarter against the Grizzlies as the first game of the new year and first in the United Center was over by halftime.  The 40 point victory can be attributed to a Grizzly squad riddled with injuries and the Bulls staunch defense.  Mike Conley was scratched with an ankle injury and Z-bo went down early with a bad looking knee injury in the 1st quarter.  Rudy Gay, OJ Mayo, and the other Gasol brother combined for 19 points.  Gross.  Not a single Grizzly starter reached double figures.  Meanwhile Boozer and Brewer had a monster games.  Boozer ripped off 17 points and 11 boards, and Brewer (who started in place of Rip who was a late scratch) poured in 17 of his own.  Deng had a quiet 11 points, but shut down Rudy Gay the entire game.  Rose floated by with 16 points and 6 dimes.  Bulls grabbed 15 more rebounds and held the Grizz to 31% shooting.  This game really wasn't close except when it was 0-0.  It was good to see that Brewer is really confident in his jumper and has extended his range.  Boozer had a good game offensively, and thankfully didn't have to guard Z-bo due to his injury.  The bench mob played most of the 4th quarter, but CJ Watson went out with an elbow injury (day-to-day).  In unscripted hilarity, John Lucas III stepped in for the injured Watson and knocked down a couple 3's immediately upon entering the game.  He scored 8 points which at the time matched the highest point total for the entire Grizzly team until 2 of their scrubs got into double digits during garbage time.  Jimmy Butler scored his first points in the NBA, which also were points 99 and 100 and thereby winning free tacos for the fans.  The fans were chanting to put in the White Mamba with 5 minutes left, in the 3rd quarter.  Unfortunately the fans didn't get their wish until 5 minutes left in the 4th.  He was reluctant to shoot the rock as he settled for being a facilitator.  He had a pretty dime to Asik and Destroy for a dunk, but the one shot he put up was an ugly 18 footer that barley grazed the left side of the rim.  Next game is Tuesday against the Hawks.

The Captain goes 5-hole on Jimmy Howard to tie the game 1-1. The fans cheer.

Speaking of Hawks, the Blackhawks took down their hated rivals, the Redwings, on Friday in a spectacular 3-2 win.  Goals by the Captain, Hossa, and Seebs gave the Hawks the most points in the NHL, followed closely by the Ca-sucks and Rangers.  Toews goal was scored off a penalty shot and his first in the NHL, bringing his total to 21.  Dude is gonna win the Hart trophy.  They play host to the Oilers tonight

A dizzying picture of Sully hacking the Big C.

For the first time in school history, the Hoosiers take down a #1 and #2 ranked team in the same year when they hung an 'L' on Ohio State on New Years Eve.  In a close game down the stretch, the Big C fouled out with more than 2 minutes left in the game.  But down 70-69 with a little more than 1:30 left in the game, the Hoosiers wouldn't allow another point and Oladipo put the Hoosiers up for good with a reverse layup with :36 left to play.  The Hoosiers move up 3 spots to #12.

I thought of ending this post with putting the "This is Indiana" video at the end, which would have probably been welcomed by all who read this.  But instead, I'll treat you to two of my favorite things.  That is of course a Derrick Rose highlight video, and the song "Ni**as in Paris".